Am now 29. It didn't hurt nearly as much as having a filling put in.
Top tips for birthdays:
- don't let anyone know about them. makes it easier for people to know when you're lying.
- spend them abroad. if not having plastic surgery, then in a villa on a distant Italian mountain where no one can hear you howling.
- have an older friend with the same birthday. My friend Rick turned 30 this year. On the same day. On an Italian mountain. Everyone was so busy scrutinising him for sudden sagging, no one noticed me glaring at my crumbling reflection in the mirror.
Sudden thought: Every time you squeeze a spot, do you also squeeze some life out of your fave?
Things that made this birthday better:
- Spending it on an Italian mountain.
- Near a pizza oven.
- With lovely people.
- And an incredibly glam juniour Doctor called Sabina who spent every available moment asleep.
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